Sunday, Naysayers and Skinny Bitches

Today is Sunday. As I write this, I am sitting on the front porch, listening to Neko Case, drinking some Cabernet, and enjoying a drop-dead gorgeous afternoon to myself and the dogs. The crop dusters are taking off and landing again at the airport a mile away. The dogs are playing dead in the sun. My herbs are growing so fast I feel like I can see them. The sky makes me remember why my favorite color used to be "sky blue."
Yes, isolation. Small town life can be isolating. Yes, it is true that we haven't had a plethora of social engagements this week. But, there are trade-offs that are maybe more valuable. Like, for instance, after church today, I had our whole family over to the house for pizza and wine. Usually we'd be getting back in the car to go to Fargo (much depressed, mind you) on a Sunday afternoon. To just be able to languish, to spend time with the family, and to do it in my "own" home felt healthy. Where one thing is missing (social life), another thing is taking over (family life).
Of course, there are ups and downs to that as well.
Despite the isolation, I am getting more time to myself these days, something that has been sorely lacking in the past three years. I would maybe NOT recommend smushing a masters and a doctorate into three year's time. It can have various.....side affects. Like NEVER EVER EVER reading for fun, never seeing friends, not having any money, developing a panic disorder, and know far, far, far too much about Gesualdo (Mara, this is you). It also has its benefits. Getting to soak up as much about one's craft as possible--focusing with a single-mindedness on ONE thing, and that one thing being something much loved. Being mentored by amazing academics. Finding the best and the worst of yourself and trying to make it better.
And now, I am getting to combine that musical focus with my rural life. I am getting to study for hours at a time about vocal literature while overlooking the prairie, the pheasants and ducks, my dogs romping in the grass.........while learning about the great song cycles of Schubert and Schumann.
I ask you, dear reader: what could be better??!!!
Answer: if you could do this without having to make a lot of compromises in other areas of life.
Therefore, I bring you the Eating Dilemma.
I just read this kick-you-in-the-ass "diet" book on a whim. I got it from a friend a few months ago, but, of course did not have time to read (see above, doctorate, etc). A few weeks ago, our realtor was having an open house, and I had to do something with the cat. So, I put him in his carrier, grabbed the Diet Tome and hauled all of us off to Island Park. And while the cat yowled continually, I read and read about things. Some things I knew before: don't eat crap. Bad food is bad for you and will bring bad results. Very common sense stuff--but said in a harsh tone that I think many need. Other things were news to me.
Now, I have read The Omnivore's Dilemma. I have seen "Food Inc." I know all about the problems in the commerical food industry. We try to eat organic as much as possible, avoid chemicals of all kinds at all costs. In fact, for me at least, this is a large part of the impetus behind why I want to be off-grid and self-reliant. If I grow my own food, I know exactly what has happened to it before it ever hits the lips or the hips.
But, Skinny Bitch (which by the way is almost a misleading title--the book seems like a diet book for L.A. girls, but ends up reading more like a PETA membership manual) brought to my attention some of the cruelty about the CAFO's and feedlots of which I needed to be reminded. It also brought to view some of the very gross practices of the food industry--selling rotten and dirty meat, for example (which the USDA is supposed to inspect, but they don't do a proper job). Which is one of the reasons why we have an e. coli problem in this country. It also did a very excellent job enumerating the various health problems that are now being associated with the various hormones, antiobiotics and chemicals that are used in the production of produce, meat, and diary. The dairy and the meat thing, for me, has been an issue where I have felt convicted of my own need to eat "clean." To avoid things with added hormones, antibiotics. I guess SB, for me, delineated very good reasons to even take my awareness above that level to avoiding meat or dairy that comes from large, commercial feedlots (i.e. anything from Food Services...so that means everything that we normally eat at restaurants).
Now, I want to be clear. I am not an animal rights activist. I am never going to join PETA. I love meat. I love dairy. The only source for vitamin B-12, a vital nutrient for humans, is from animal protein--so that in an of itself should tell us that animal protein is a necessary part of our diets (unless you are supplementing).
But, there is a problem when feedlot workers are abusing animals for the pure sport of it--doing awful, unspeakable things just for the pure "fun" of torture. Those workers have lost some of their humanity in doing those jobs and have become so desensitized to killing that they no longer feel anything about it--and thereby are able to becoming overwhelmingly malicious towards the animals.
This is something that I cannot condone. There is no purpose in it.
Thereby, my quest is to only eat meat if I know the person who killed it, and that the animal was grass bed and lived the way its particular species is happy to live, being fed things it is made to eat, and things that by the same turn, are healthy for humans to eat. I only will eat dairy that has similar qualifications--milked from pasture-raised animals, etc, etc.
Or, eating wild meat hunted by a family member that has been living *exactly* the way it was meant to live.
I don't think that's very animal-rightsy to think that way. I think it is common sense. Cows should eat things that cows are meant to eat and live in a way that cows are designed to live. Duh.
We have to stop thinking that all of these chemicals that have been put into our food, our animals, our water, our fields, our bodies for the past 60 years are "harmless." They are causing lots of harm....
The book goes into that, into the practices of the USDA and the FDA and the various levels of corruption therein, etc, etc. It's not conspiracy theory anymore, people. This stuff has been documented by a myriad of different researchers and is being brought to the attention of the general public more and more. We need to get our heads out of our asses and start using some common sense again. We need to eat food produced in the most natural way possible...and stop thinking that all of these safe "additives" are safe.
Blah, blah, blah. The book says not to get preachy. I don't mean to be preachy. I do mean to say that following these convictions is especially difficult in an isolated area where virtually all food comes from one of two sources: 1) You make/grow/kill it yourself. 2) It comes from food services of america--------straight from all of the commercial farming operations.
This brings me to the naysayers. You know who you are. You are the ones thinking "It is impossible to eat this way in a small town (or at all)." You are the ones thinking "She believes in conspiracy theories." or "She's too idealistic."
You go right ahead. Keep telling me I can't do something. That just makes me want to succeed all the more.
Why? Because I was raised in a town that is filled.........absolutely to the brim.........with naysayers. People who say "can't" before you are even done telling them your idea.
If Billy and I listen to naysayers, we will not even have the chance to live the lifestyle we want to. We will keep putting chemicals into our bodies. We will keep paying the electric company for something we could make ourselves. We will keep buying the sweetheart bread with the potassium bromate in it because we "couldn't possibly" make bread for ourselves every week.
I mean, I couldn't possibly succeed in this lifestyle, could I??!! I couldn't possibly be a near-vegan living on a farm in SW ND off grid on my own terms?
Why not? And why not try? God knows I have failed at plenty of things in my life. Failure is just another opportunity to figure out a better way to do something. Bring on the naysaying.
Over the course of the next few weeks, I would like to continue to discuss some of the basic principles promoted in Skinny Bitch as I think they are easy ideas that nearly anyone can follow.